A Typical Conversation

Before the holidays the last thing I do at work is typically wish everyone I work with a Merry Christmas or a Happy Easter or whatever. I especially make sure to do this with the Jehovah’s Witnesses. On the day before Thanksgiving 2006 one of these conversations went something like this:

Me: Have a Happy Thanksgiving.

JW: I don’t celebrate Thanksgiving.

Me: You don’t celebrate Thanksgiving? Why not?

JW: I’m one of Jehovah’s Witnesses. We don’t celebrate Thanksgiving or any other holidays.

Me: Why is that?

JW: Because of the pagan origins of Thanksgiving.

Me: Pagan origins? You mean the Pilgrims and the Indians giving thanks?

JW: Yeah. There were pagan origins.

Me: I don’t understand. Please explain further.

JW: Thanksgiving has pagan origins somehow. So we can’t celebrate it. Because of the pagan origins.
Me: OK. Whatever. What would happen if you would celebrate it.

JW: I would be disfellowshipped.  Basically, I would be shunned by my family.

Me: For celebrating Thanksgiving?

JW: Yes.

Me: Well, have a Happy Thursday then. Enjoy your day off.

JW: Thanks.

Me: So, what do you have planned on your day off then?

JW: My wife and I are going to my mom’s for dinner. My brothers are bringing their families too.

Me: So, you’re having Thanksgiving dinner?

JW: No! That’s pagan.

Me: OK. What are you having?

JW: Turkey and mashed potatoes. And cranberries too.

Me: Let me guess – you’re also having pumpkin pie.

JW: Yes.

Me: But, it’s not Thanksgiving dinner?

JW: No!

Me: Because you don’t celebrate Thanksgiving?

JW: Right!

Me: OK. Whatever. Have a Happy Thursday.

I have had very similar conversations around almost every holiday with about a half dozen Jehovah’s Witnesses.